Where’s the Beauty? Conclusion.

Part Two – Conclusion

Yesterday’s story had a point and the point was made; however, there is an ending to the story that should be told. It is quite bittersweet, if not sad.

Those two ladies and I were the best of friends. The young woman I had the argument with, let’s call her Sally and the other woman, Jane, and I were excellent friends, almost the three musketeers.

Sally and I never dated, but Jane and I did fall for each other and go out. In the beginning Sally thought this was great. I later learned (from Jane) that, mostly, Sally would enjoy hearing all about our private lives because, of course, we would tell her because we were such good friends. The problem became that both Jane and I were very hushed to Sally about our love life for several reasons.

Three’s Company? Yes, in a lot of ways!

And, of course, right or wrong, we both spent much less time with Sally as we spent more time as a couple. This angered Sally and she was a conniving person when angry.

So, first she got her ducks in a row, then, when talking to Jane, asked her if I had ever told her how beautiful she was. She thought about it and realized that I hadn’t. This led her to the beginnings of doubt about our relationship.

Then, Sally talked to me about whether or not I had told Jane how beautiful she was. Obviously, I hadn’t and this led me to wondering about our relationship.

Now, Jane was not truly physically beautiful; however, she was very pretty, and smart and caring and funny and a good mother who also took care of her mother and father in her home. However, Sally put that doubt there and it did its job and ate through the relationship.

Revenge just never really works out no matter how you plan.

I finally broke up with Jane. Jane’s reaction was horrible; she had never had a person break up with her; she had always been the one to end things. She stopped going to the Parents Without Partner meetings and quit talking to both Sally and me. I found out about two months later that she had married a guy and moved out west somewhere and that they were in counseling for marital problems.

I figured out what Sally had done and stopped talking to her altogether. I found out later that she had gotten pregnant with twins, had not married the father, and was making due on her own.

Years later, I recognized her last name as the owner of a mortuary. I called and he informed me he was her uncle. He would not tell me anything about how to contact her (protecting her, good for him), but did let me know that she was doing well and that he would let her know I had called with concern.

Linda, your comment brought those memories back to me. I see all the lessons that are in this story, but the biggest is simply how friendships really change once problems, even really correctable ones, enter into them.

Jane and I, obviously, had other problems in our relationship than me simply not telling her she was beautiful. It hadn’t made any difference until Sally started in on it. And, Sally, in my opinion, was fairly vindictive. I was a mess and had a lot of growing up to do.

Things happen; things change. I do wish I could see those two just to observe where we all are in life now and say I am sorry for various things. I learned from all of it and that is the big point.

Argument and breakup; there are lessons there.

Have you had a huge mess-up like this in your past?

Have you lost friends over things that could have been easily worked out?

_
Namaste,
Scott

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Comments

  • Linda Stapleton de Martinez  On October 18, 2012 at 7:47 am

    Great sharing, Scott, thank you. I’m sure I have, but I need to reflect on this before considering recounting any similar unfortunate situations.

    Like

  • Indira  On October 18, 2012 at 2:18 am

    Hi, sometimes less of communication breaks friendship or relationship.

    Like

  • buckwheatsrisk  On October 17, 2012 at 10:23 pm

    that is to bad 😦 i can’t remember if i’ve had any “mess ups” that could be easily worked out.

    Like

    • kindredspirit23  On October 17, 2012 at 11:07 pm

      Well, I don’t know how easily this one could have been worked out, but it could have been worked out.

      Like

      • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 12:14 am

        true it might not have been easy.

        Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 12:55 am

          Things going well for you and hubby and the Pooch?

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 11:02 am

          they are thanks! Hubby back to work, pooch on the mend and i got another room painted yesterday and had the first stress free day in weeks! it was wonderful.
          how are you?

          Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 1:59 pm

          Doing Ok. Go to doctor in Indianapolis tomorrow to decide if I can get a lubrication injection in my hip to greatly reduce the pain for about 2-3 months. We will see. Have had two in the past. One worked, one didn’t. Lot of money for no work. But, you know how that is.
          Scott

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 2:28 pm

          Oh boy! Here’s hoping it works this time!! How goes the sleep battle??

          Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 2:31 pm

          Sheep are losing.

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 2:32 pm

          is that good?

          Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 3:03 pm

          Nah! I try to count them and they poop on me.

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 3:04 pm

          that sucks! do i need to get my bat? lol

          Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 3:06 pm

          No, actually, I work on the first couple of chapters in my third book (in my head) and, usually, fall asleep quickly. Problem is that I still wake up after 2 hours. I need, at least, 4 straight at some point. I got that once this week.
          I will try going to bed a bit earlier tonight. That seems to help some.
          Scott

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 3:09 pm

          that’s rough!
          on a funny note is it a good thing that your book is putting you to sleep? 😉

          Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 3:15 pm

          I knew you were going to say that! lol
          What it is, is that I have done those particular scenes in my head for so long that, fortunately, my brain just starts ignoring it all and goes to sleep. If I try something else, then I get tied up in it and think about it for hours.

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 3:36 pm

          ahaha i guess you’re on to me! 😉 suurrreee that’s what it is…

          Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 4:17 pm

          Well, lol, all I have to refute that is my son read those too chapters that I started once and said he thought they were excellent. I started them as a daydream and have built on it for about 3 years now. I know it will make a good book when I feel I can take the rigor I will need to get on and stay on a schedule like that. It’s coming. I could never have done it before the stroke.

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 5:50 pm

          Well now you can so go for it!! What if you just wrote as you feel like it when the mood hits and not put yourself on a schedule, you might find it more fun and less daunting???

          Like

        • kindredspirit23  On October 18, 2012 at 10:35 pm

          Thinking about it. There’s another problem that I don’t want to get into, but I, certainly, can start writing them on a feel like it schedule.

          Like

        • buckwheatsrisk  On October 18, 2012 at 10:37 pm

          okay 🙂

          Like

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