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Friday Fictioneers – March 29, 2013
“Darkness Comes”
Carol stared at the kerosene lanterns trying to burn the darkness.
The electricity had gone out weeks ago and the valuable liquid, at least, disappeared slowly.
She had the shades up in the afternoon overcast. Soon it would be night and they would come out again.
George had tried to scare them off. He had taken the axe and had run out screaming and swinging.
They hadn’t even altered their direction to get away. George had made it back to the house, but not unscathed.
She watched him breathing slowly in the corner and loaded the gun, just in case.
Comments
I am scared . Where is my Winnie the pooh 🙂 Pooh makes it all better !
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I agree Winnie is good for almost all soothing!
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Yes he is!
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Hi Scott,
You capture the real scariness that comes with darkness and the creatures that roam in the night. I’d load the gun too. Ron
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Reminiscent of Hitchcock and “The Birds”….
Better to read in the morning than at dusk 🙂
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Wow! Thanks for such a huge compliment.
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You write like King. Keeps me on the edge of my seat….
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I used to read King all the time. Then, it was Koontz. Now (shh!) I read JD Robb “In Death” series (Norah Roberts pen name for sci-fi romance/drama). Wonderful!
Glad I kept you thrilled…I have posted a full story that began as a FF 100 word one. Check it out if you get the chance.
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Hey, at least we know Nora can be versatile. 🙂 I’ll do my best to read your story. Can’t wait to be scared.
Love, Renee
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Not my scariest, but decent. I like the published ones better.
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Who are you published with?
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Published in http://www.atomicavarice.com under fiction and
in Kindle and Amazon story in anthology – Dead Sea at http://www.amazon.com/The-Dead-Sea-Kevin-Bufton/dp/1478310596/ref=sr_1_sc_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1364615001&sr=8-1-spell&keywords=dead+sea+blufton
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Have several more, but not in print yet.
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Good for you. I recently had a few short stories published. Need to put the blogging aside soon so I can write my book. I was published through Etherbooks.com
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That’s wonderful. I have a book series in mind, but now does not feel like the time to pursue that, so I will wait.
Good luck. Keep me informed.
I do beta reading if you need it.
Scott
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Here’s the first of the four parts:
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Trembling here. Scary, Scott.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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So, now George is “infected?” Use the GUN!!! Scary stuff.
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A normal day in TWD. She will use something. Don’t waste the bullets.
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Lots of horror stories from this week’s prompt, and I really like your zombie take on it. Carol’s smart to watch George, who was brave but probably foolish to rush out there…
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It’s okay; you can say George was stupid; I imagine Carol thinks that about now.
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Ay Yi Yi! We will be needing the big gum methinks! A lot of tension in this 100 word offering. I hope the mister can survive this!
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Very nice. It says a lot in very few words. I’ll be coming back for more.
By the way, Susie Lindau sent me. Cheers!
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That’s really great. Thanks!
Scott
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That’s a superb nightmare scenario. If you ever expand this into a full short story (or novel), let me know 🙂
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I will consider the full short story. That could be really fun. If I do, I will, most likely, post it over a few days’ time.
Thanks!
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well written enjoyed it ! 🙂
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Glad you did! Thanks for visiting.
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Creepy story, Scott. I don’t feel too confident in their ability to hold out much longer.
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I try to keep TWD in mind. They have done well.
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Oh dear! Spooky.
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🙂
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She should just blow him away now! Well written. Nice work Scott…just hope she gets the courage up to pull the trigger or swing the ax on this soon to be ex of hers!
Tom
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Probably axe now that I think of the rule in TWD – don’t waste bullets.
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i feel the trapped sensation and the hopelessness. damn these zombies.. i wonder if Carol’d have to use the gun on George
ps nominated you for an award 🙂 http://theeclecticeccentricshopaholic.wordpress.com/2013/03/28/blog-bling/
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Wow! Thanks…looking forward to that.
Yep, horror writer here – Carol uses gun.
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oh oh the zombies cometh…good one!
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Why thank you!
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Zombies? Mutant animals, aliens, escaped cons? You left me wanting to fight for Carol and George. Hope they make it.
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I think George is done.
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ZOMBIE!!! RUN!
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Ah, most of the time, you can walk!
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Oh zombies.. You definitely need Reaper in this.
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Yes, perhaps, I do.
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Nicely done Scott, I agree with Jan…you and Bill should get together lol.
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Excellent, great atmosphere and suspense. Loved it!
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🙂
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Very night of the living dead. I loved the line “lanterns trying to burn the darkness.” Very descriptive. Good story.
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Quite scary… well written as usual, Scott.
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Thanks!
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I wouldn’t turn my back on George. Not for a while anyway. Nice one.
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Thanks, and, she won’t.
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and oops me for gund..what the heck is a gund? g u n s ok going now
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Wondered, but decided to wait.
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🙂 thanks ks
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oops Janet 🙂
loving the different themes, I wonder if gund would bother them since they didn’t move for an axe being swung…guess it’s a quicker option though 😉
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Scott, you and Bill should be together. Maybe Reaper and Madman could help this couple.
janet
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“Should get together.”
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lol
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