What it’s all about: Five Sentence Fiction is about packing a powerful punch in a tiny fist. Each week Lillie will post a one word inspiration, then anyone wishing to participate will write a five sentence story based on the prompt word. The word does not have to appear in your five sentences, just use it for direction.
This week: Edge
Don’t confuse this with Friday Fictioneers! That is 100 words from a photo prompt. Go here for that. For FSF click on the above pic (after you read my story!).
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Edge
By Scott L Vannatter 4/11/2013
He held the razor blade in his right hand with the edge toward his throat’s carotids.
It had been a horrible year, beginning with his parent’s divorce and the subsequent out-of-state move all the way to his original girlfriend calling him to break up over the phone due to the distance between them, both from the move and his sad attitude over the entire separation mess.
He thought how easy it would be to take the thin stainless steel blade and slice his throat while no one was home and he would be gone before anyone even suspected he was serious about the entire business.
He pictured his parent’s faces when the coroner told them or when his mom walked in to find him dead; he pictured his girlfriend and the pain she would go through; he pictured his sister as she realized she would no longer have him as her supporter and confidante; he pictured her with the blade in her hand.
He took the blade and cut the wire in half to finish his electronics project for science.
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Namaste,
Scott
Comments
You built up the tension really well to that brilliant twist ending.
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Thank you!
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nice twist on a good read. thanks for sharing!
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You are welcome.
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Gosh, I was so worried he was going to. I love how you capture all the thoughts running through his head. Teenage angst, plus dealing with such hard life events, such temptation. Well written x
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Thanks. I taught middle school enough and talked to those troubled students enough to have a good idea what goes through their heads. Besides, I was a teen too! 🙂
Scott
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So close….he didn’t that time…but next time? Well done.
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Thinking of his dear sister may stop it every time. But, that doesn’t mean life will be easy, does it?
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You are a brilliant writer Scott..wow i thought he would do it and phew that god..but you sure know how to keep readers hooked and on th edge…
what a story
love ya 🙂
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It’s what I like to do. As I told someone else, I wasn’t certain when I started if he would make it. I imagine that helped.
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So glad he made the right choice.
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Yes, I am too. I wasn’t sure when I started writing.
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I think this is exactly what some depressive people go through sometimes. Glad he made the right choice. Good story as always.
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Well done! I was holding my breath.
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That was the hope!
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disaster avoided
Cheers!
JzB
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Yes, I am glad you see it that way.
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phew
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Yeah, a little dark, but not for me…:-)
Scott
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ha!
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Have you posted yet how the dentist went? I will be reading it tonight if you have. If not, at least, I know you made it home (or never went, I suppose…hmm).
Scott
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i did 😉
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