Friday Fictioneers – Attention, Please – Humorous – PG

Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields, gives us an opportunity to create 100 +/- word stories based on the photo prompt.

After reading mine below, click > HERE < for the rest.   Enjoy!!!

PHOTO PROMPT Copyright-Ted Strutz

 

Attention, Please!

by Scott L Vannatter – 100 Words

 

“Now, Mr. Saleno, please just look out the window at the beautiful scenery while I fix your tooth.”

Joe Saleno decided to do just that: distract himself so as not to be nervous.

He looked out the Dentist’s window.

He saw the boat realizing it had a bridge;

He looked at the truck thinking it might have a drill in the back;

The house had steps that looked like teeth and the paint was probably enamel-based.

“Mr. Saleno, please stop!”

Joe stopped looking out the window (which had a pane, by the way) and realized he had bit the dentist.

____________________________

Namaste,

Scott

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Comments

  • Nan Falkner  On June 17, 2014 at 8:33 pm

    Dear kindredspirit23, He was really terrified of the dentist and was so intense with trying to calm himself down that he bit the dentists’ finger. OUCH! Poor dentist! Good story! Thanks, Nan 🙂

    Like

  • Sarah Ann  On June 16, 2014 at 1:53 pm

    Wonderful wordplay.

    Like

  • aliciajamtaas  On June 14, 2014 at 10:54 am

    This is great! Relating the outside world to what’s happening inside his mouth. Kudos.

    Like

  • Indira  On June 14, 2014 at 9:29 am

    Lol. This is so good. Loved it.

    Like

  • Björn Rudberg (brudberg)  On June 13, 2014 at 6:03 pm

    That was sharp my friend…

    Like

  • Rick Daddario  On June 12, 2014 at 8:02 am

    bwahahaha. aloha Scott. i like your sense of humor. a fun read. aloha.

    Like

  • dmmacilroy  On June 12, 2014 at 6:00 am

    Dear Scott,

    I liked the mental gymnastics you detailed but your sentence construction (at least two of them) need some drilling. The boat realized it had a bridge? The van thought it had a drill in the back? A comma in the first and, ‘He looked at the truck and thought it might have a drill in the back’ will put things right.

    Great concept.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    Like

    • kindredspirit23  On June 12, 2014 at 11:42 pm

      Yes, actually, two commas would have done it, I believe. Can I chuck it up to being so tired that night, I am surprised I actually wrote anything?

      Like

      • dmmacilroy  On June 14, 2014 at 6:46 am

        Dear Scott,

        I’ll just read from now on and assume that you’re tired. Sorry ’bout that.

        Aloha,

        Doug

        Like

        • kindredspirit23  On June 16, 2014 at 12:27 am

          Oh no! Go ahead and comment. Let me know. Being tired is no excuse, just a reason.
          I want to know when I do something like that.
          Thank you!
          Scott

          Like

  • rochellewisoff  On June 12, 2014 at 5:55 am

    Dear Scott,

    I’m sure we’ve all wanted to bite the dentist at one time or another. However I stumbled over your last line. “He had bitten” not “he had bit.”

    Funny stuff.

    shalom,

    Rochelle

    Like

    • kindredspirit23  On June 12, 2014 at 11:44 pm

      As with Dmmacilroy, I claimed extreme tiredness on all three horrendous grammar errors. I have started some new medication. We shall see.

      Like

  • Horus  On June 12, 2014 at 4:43 am

    So many scenic items to distract the attention away from the event – isn’t it 🙂

    nicely done !

    Like

  • Ellespeth  On June 12, 2014 at 12:18 am

    Now this was funny and very well written 🙂
    Ellespeth

    Like

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