You know, I could really complain this week. I mean, I guess we all have the right to complain all the time. And, some of us probably have good reason; however, I don’t think I will. When I started this post I wasn’t certain just what direction I was going to take. A good part of me wanted the feelings I get when I drop everything off my chest and let the world have it. Then, there’s the other part of me that says, “Why do that? Things could be so much worse.” And, finally, there’s the third part. That’s the one that realizes the complaining part is a temporary fix and everyone else gets tired of hearing it, and the second part is a bit of a cop out because it can ALWAYS be worse. Just telling yourself that it could be worse doesn’t allow you to feel what’s going on. You are trapped with the idea that you should never complain because it could ALWAYS be worse.
This third part is that small voice that has you more looking at the positives than the negatives. You can’t ignore the negatives; that would be the “Pollyanna” attitude of the sun will come out tomorrow thing… I don’t want that; what I want is simply to see life as it is: good and bad.
I lost a friend yesterday; he was my chiropractor; he was my family’s chiropractor for many years. He was a casual friend, but he was a friend. I knew him by name; I have seen pictures of his ex-wife and his little girl. I have spoken to him about some personal problems and asked advice. In short, I knew him; now, he’s gone. I don’t know any other details yet. What matters is that there is a little piece of me that has a hole in it, and I know his family has a larger hole.
All of this happening when I am at a point in which I realize I am 56 years old and, while I am getting better, I am not in perfect health. I have a father whose health is worse than mine. I have a wonderful sister who has her own set of problems, just like my Mom. And, I have friends, each with his or her own problems, too. It just gets me to thinking.
The world is a fleeting place. We are on it for something less than 120 years. Then, we are gone. Life continues; people don’t forget you, but, eventually, there is no one who has actually met you who is still alive. The things I do here will be reflected in the attitudes and actions of those I know and love. My children make me proud. I know that when I do leave this world they are going to be making it a better place rather than causing the problems everyone has to face. That’s a good feeling.
What’s really great is to know that my writing will survive me. My blog posts have been a help and/or inspiration to some. I have made friends and, if I go, they will remember, at least, for awhile.
This post has gone almost full circle; it started out as almost a whine and now has circled back to being a positive note on being here. This is almost an esoteric posting. It is intended more to get my thoughts out than to make you think anything in particular. However, I would be very interested in knowing how you think and feel after reading this. What say you?