Tag Archives: medication

A Tale and a Thought or Two…

A man was out and about in a large city. He had no mask and no gloves and no worries. He entered a well-to-do hotel and went to a room. He didn’t stop at the front desk nor had he booked a room for the night. He was not concerned about this either. The room was large with a huge bed in the up corner. As he lay on the bed he turned his head and could see out into the hall leading to the next room. The bed was comfortable and he drifted off to sleep. When he awoke, he looked strangely around at the room. It no longer looked familiar. In fact, now he was worried that he was here.

“What will I say to whomever is staying here?” Then, thinking he heard a noise from outside the room. “That must be the maid. What will she think if the wrong person is here?”

He started to sit up and realized he was caught up in the covers and blankets. He tried to push them off, but the more he tried the harder it was. He forced himself to sit and shook his head. Now, everything shifted a tiny bit in the room and he realized he was home, in his bed. The “hall” which was now his own hallway leading to the house. He lay there disconcerted, but knew it had been a dream.

Just a short story to help you if you are feeling uptight or bothered. The scenario above was the one I woke up to this morning. I take some medicine which makes my dreams more frequent and vivid. I really did think I was in a large hotel bedroom. The “shift” which happened when I sat up is common when I actually move, waking up. They used to be night terrors and I used to wake up shouting, screaming, or utterly in panic. It’s funny what just a little more medication can do. Especially when it was taken to calm me down and sleep better since Sis’s death.

We are all having to deal with so much now. I see avoidance behaviors, fear behaviors, denial behaviors, and so on. So many ways all of us try to handle all the mixes of feelings we have and all the things we see others do or hear them saying.

My aunt’s test came back positive, but she is displaying no symptoms whatsoever. There are returning her to her own room. She can’t go to the other facility at the present time since her test was positive.

I am dealing with it all in my own way, a lot of dreaming, but most of it just the realization that all is perfect in the end. I am not trying to make light of anyone’s discomfort or a relative’s death. My faith understands that we may not know how or why it’s perfect, but it happens and there is something much larger going on. My beliefs do not try and pin blame on anyone or anything. We make out own paths and decide their directions. I am realizing more and more that this faith I have chosen will not always be popular with everyone and I won’t always understand it either. I just know and believe. I feel it deep down and in this age’s time of confusion and fear, it’s a rather nice one to fall back on.

Here’s to whatever or whomever you follow. May your faith hold you solid in these trying times.

Scott

A Night and a Day…

This is one of those days in which I wish I had a post already scheduled or another, at least, prepared.  I didn’t sleep last night.  No, I don’t mean I didn’t sleep “well”; I mean, I didn’t sleep.  I stayed up a bit late, but nothing I haven’t done before.  I took my meds for sleep, sat down at the computer to finish something, and then went to bed.

When I got in bed, I was extremely fidgety.  I could not settle; I could not concentrate; I could not dream well enough to ignore everything.  Finally, about 5am, I got up and went into the computer area.  I was done; I just didn’t know how much yet.

I looked through some things, then, in a fit, I ordered online a streaming version of “Dexter”  Season 7 and began watching.  It is now about 5:37pm and I have watched 5 full episodes.  I have watched the pilot of Stephen King’s “Under the Dome” and added it to my watch list.  I have played “Minecraft”.  I have checked email, read posts, read news, and tried to fix a computer problem (bad news when you are tired).  During the last, I managed to knock stacks of things over around my computer, lose all my passwords (found them), and load/unload “Firefox” multiple times.

Oh, yes…I lay down twice to “sleep”.

I, finally, got about 3 hours in 1 hour increments spread out over 5 hours.  What does this mean?

It means…I am exhausted.  Understand that I can’t just lie down and sleep when I want to.  Right now, I am very tired, but my mind is not sleepy and won’t cooperate for a nap.  I will just get feisty again.

The good news is that I am going to Indy early in the morning to see my son and I will need to get up about 8am, earlier than normal.  To do this, I was going to have to try and sleep earlier tonight – I don’t think that will be a problem now.

Thank you friends, for reading this and understanding and caring about my life.  It means the world to me.

PS – Went to see “The Heat” yesterday with Sandra Bullock (Well, I didn’t go with Sandra, but you understand).  Anyway, language is very strong, but the movie gets a 5 star from me for being the funniest thing I have seen in quite a while.

Namaste,

Scott

My First Time

Got your attention, didn’t I?  No, not that first time (that’s a story for another time).  I am talking about what happened today before this was posted.  You see, today is Sunday.  I am writing for my Thursday post because Wednesday is my first time…for a colonoscopy.  This has been something my doctor has threatened mentioned over the last few years, so I knew it was coming.  However, my being disabled and on Medicare, I think, is what pushed this to a “do it now” type of thing.  I have a feeling there will be several things that are “do it now” concerning medical procedures now that I am on Medicare.

http://www.gihealth.com/html/test/colonoscopy.html

I am only a little worried about it all.  I mean, the idea of a camera … well … that doesn’t sound so great, but I worry more about the anesthesia than anything.  I have reacted differently to so many things and being out is just another concern.  I certainly don’t want to be awake, but being out has its bad side, too.  It doesn’t help that, even though they have little to do with each other, the last time I was “out” I “died” too.  Although, I guess it won’t get much worse than that? 🙂

Here’s the actual worst part:  you have do stop your meds and such.  They allow a little for my diabetic meds, but the real problem is that I take 3 meds to sleep and stay asleep and I am now told I can’t take any of them the night before!  So, basically, I will lie awake until about 7am, then about the time I get to sleep I have to get up.  I will not be a happy camper that day.  I don’t know who you should pray harder for:  me or them.

Anyway, I figure Wednesday I will not be fit to write a post, so this is it.  For those of you who think I don’t really have much to worry about, let’s try this:  have you seen the movie “Awake”?  Yes?  ’nuff said.

Namaste,

Scott

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Philosophy is all about being curious, asking basic questions. And it can be fun!

North Noir

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