Getting Away from the Narcissist…

Great article.  These help me understand many parts of my life and the lives of those around me whom I care for.

http://1solutionfocusedcoaching.com/2012/02/20/why-am-i-feeling-so-crazy-codependents-learning-from-their-narcissistic-partners/#comment-6966

Namaste,

Scott

Robin’s Gone, Now is the Time to Scream…

Source: Google Image Search (with license for reuse). Click on pic for page.

Okay, here are two things I know:

1)  Today I am supposed to do my Five Sentence Fiction entry for the week.  I will do it tomorrow.

2)  Everywhere people are talking about 2 things:  Robin Williams’ death and Depression.  I will make one more.

Seriously, I imagine there are dozens (or more) of posts on depression and Robin Williams made in the last few days.  I was not going to add to them, but then I saw this:

http://www.upworthy.com/in-response-to-robin-williams-death-the-most-powerful-description-of-depression-ive-ever-heard?c=upw1

Now, see?  This one got me going.  Why?  Because I, too, have been there.  I have sat in a hospital on a bed in a place where the doctor comes in, asks you a bunch of questions, then decides what happens to you.  I have never tried suicide, but I understand it.  My contention is that suicide is a very permanent solution to a temporary problem.  That’s what I told the doc.  Then I told him that there are just times I wish I had never been.  He said, “Close enough.” and into the stress center I went.  Two weeks to begin to solve a lifetime problem.

I prayed.  I prayed and I tried so many things.  However, for me, it took a stroke.  When I awoke from my stroke, I was no longer depressed.  I am anxious (nothing new), but not depressed.  I don’t worry much about dying anymore (I have had that experience).  I realize that life is great and that I truly need to focus on enjoying life and making it count.

Recently, I published a book on Kindle.  I have also published in actual paper books 4 times and another time online.  That makes me a published author.  That’s a big one on my bucket list.  Am I rich?  Not with money, no.  But, that’s not what I asked for (that was a separate thing!).  I wanted to be published; I am.

The thing is:  you truly don’t understand depression unless you have been there; that’s no joke.  I had a lot of people and family say, “Let it go.”  “Smile.”  and “Just get over it.”  None of those work.  I saw a psychologist for years; I was on strong medication for years.  Having the depression gone now just feels like such a load off of me.

So, I won’t tell all of you out there who are depressed to “get over it.”  What I will say is “don’t stop trying.  Don’t give up. See a professional.”  You worried about the money?  There are cheap and/or free places to go.  Also, curing yourself or learning to deeply deal with it is so very important.  Don’t be afraid to spend the money on yourself to get better.  You can!  Need someone to talk to?  I am here.

Namaste,

Scott

How Depressing?

I am not going to say too much here,  just let you watch.

It is a comic definition of depression.  It was reviewed 20 times and has 5000 comments.

Enjoy!

Comic version of Depression

Namaste,

Scott

Education?

I am no longer, officially, in the education system.  I do not get up in front of a class and talk to students and try to help them improve themselves.  Here is a student who had something to say and decided to say it.

Student Speaks Up!

You know one of the big differences between high school students and adults?  Adults usually know when to keep quiet.  We don’t stand up and speak our minds if it means being impolite.  Society has taught that to us.  Does that make us always right?

No.

Through the course of history, it has not, normally, been the quiet, polite, soft-spoken people who made the differences in our lives.  It was the Martin Luther King Jrs, and the John F Kennedys, and the Pattons who have gone to bat for the rest of us and marked out a line that leads to a better place for all of us to be.

I am so tired of hearing the word “standardization” used in education.  Is it important to have a set of standards to teach to?

Yes.

Does that mean we need to teach every student the same way and have them pass the exact same test and do things the exact same way for them to learn.

OMG, NO!

This country’s educational system is on its way down.  You mark my words.  If we, as the citizens of a nation, do not take it upon ourselves to speak loudly and with great intent to the “experts” who are saying that teaching so that students can pass a set of tests that “prove” they are learning is the way to go, it will be the way to be gone.

I was in a classroom full of students who were “failures” by the standards of our educational system.  These kids had great difficulty taking tests; they couldn’t pace themselves to do their homework; they acted up in class.  In short, they fell short of what the educational system stated they needed to know and do to succeed.

The worst part is that, most of the educational system, had already given up on them.  “Babysitters” was what many (not all) thought our job was to be.  Do you know what I found?  I found that when a teacher honestly took a decent period of time with each student and let them know that:

1)  I know it’s hard for you

2)  I care a lot about you

3)  You can succeed

4)  You are special

When I did that, I got results.  Did I have problems?  Yep,  Did I have days and weeks when I wanted to scream? Give that an amen.  But, I also had times when a student would push through and succeed in something.  I had kids who could smile because they did something good.

I had one student who worked for me.  He did well enough that, by the standards I set for students, he received an A+ in that class.  He thanked me after report cards came out.  Why?  Because he had never received an A+ before.  I told him he didn’t need to thank me, he earned it.  He left my class and went back to regular school the next semester and I never heard from him again.  He went on.  He didn’t come back.

I “trusted” my students to behave and I trusted them with things that a lot of other teachers said, “You are setting yourself up for bad news.”  You know what?  So many more times than not, they lived up to my expectations and succeeded.  They made me proud.  Not all, not every time, but it was certainly worth the time and effort to do it.

What was the best was that I dealt with each student as an individual.  I didn’t do the cookie-cutter thing.  That just didn’t work.  I believe I made a difference (I know I did) in a lot of those students’ lives.

We are failing right now.  I am not going to blame the government, the school system, or the teachers.  I am simply going to state that we are failing right now.  That means that someone, anyone, us needs to begin setting a change in order.  We need to succeed for them to succeed.

There is no one simple thing that will “fix it all”.  We have to learn to work together and to give a Damn about it.  Okay, I am swearing; I am done.

Note:  I said, I was done, but then I read Bert’s post on this same subject and saw this video.  Please visit Bert and watch this very important 20 min TED  Talk.

TED Talk on Education – Very Important!!! 20 min

Namaste,

Scott